Carpe Diem

A couple hundred years ago, Benjamin Franklin shared with the world the secret of his success. ''Never leave that till tomorrow, '' he said, ''which you can do today." This is the man who discovered electricity. You'd think more of us would listen to what he had to say. I don't know why we put things off, but if I had to guess, I'd say it has a lot to do with fear. Fear of failure, fear of pain, fear of rejection.

Whatever it is we're afraid of, one thing holds true. That, by the time the pain of not doing a thing gets worse than the fear of doing it, it can feel like we're carrying around a giant tumor. Metaphorically in any case. He who hesitates is lost, after all. We can't pretend we haven't been told. We've all heard the proverbs, heard the philosophers, heard our grandparents warning us about wasted time, heard the damn poets urging us to seize the day.

Still, sometimes, we have to see for ourselves. We have to make our own mistakes. Lock the door. We have to learn our own lessons.  We have to sweep today's possibility under tomorrow's rug until we can't anymore, until we finally understand for ourselves what Benjamin Franklin meant. That knowing is better than wondering. That waking is better than sleeping. And that even the biggest failure, even the worst, most intractable mistake beats the hell out of never trying.

The power of the positive mind

Believe.

If you want to have something show up in your life, the ind of person you'd like to become, manifest something new into your life, something powerful or whatever it might be.  You must obviously first be able to imagine it.  Your imagination is able to do all that you ask of it in proportion to the degree of attention you focus upon it.  Ask yourself what kind of attention do you place on your desires? 

Einstein observed: "Imagination is more important than knowledge.  Knowledge is limited.  Imagination encircles the world." 

Logic and reason with get you from point A to point B, but imagination will take you everywhere and anywhere you can dream.  Make your future dreams a present fact by assuming the feeling of the wish having already been fulfilled.  That which you feel yourself to be, you are; and you are given that which you are.  So assume the feeling that would be yours when you are already in possession of your wish or dream. 

Your dream will be realized, so live in the very feeling of  being the one you want to be and that you shall be.  If this assumption about what you'd like to become or have is persisted in, until it becomes your dominant feeling,the attainment of your ideal is absolutely inevitable.  You must first assume the feeling of a wish fulfilled in all aspect of your life.

Do not ever allow anyone else's opinions, don't allow others negativity, shortcomings, failures, assumptions, or what you read elsewhere from someone else's research out there to distract or discourage you from realizing what is or is not possible for you.  If you advance confidently in the direction of your own dreams and endeavour to live the life which you have imagined for yourself you will meet with a success that while unexpected in common hours is entirely possible.

Retrain your subconscious mind.  For your subconscious mind responds to what it is that your suggest to it.  Your subconscious mind determines a great deal of your conscious behaviours.  It is the "id" and super ego at work behind the scenes with each action you take.  96 to 97% of everything you do is done as a result of your id, ego, super ego and subconscious mind.  Thus when your subconscious mind is programmed, it responds to that which it has been placed within it by your conscious mind. 

You are the creator, the captain of your soul.   

 

    

Play your part well...

Yes, life is a play, and only some can be good playwrights, dramaturges holding the power to change the way the story ends.

Constructive criticism is your friend

"The millennial generation does not like being wrong.  They are unaccustomed to it.  Their education – a unique blend of No Child Left behind, helicopter parenting, and oppression olympics, has made them uncomfortable with socratic criticism."

 -Stephen T. Asma

Single by choice

"How would you like to live under my skirt?"  

Things we think but never say or act upon is as vast as the space above us.

A light in the dark

We've seen tragedy before. Small events, large events, foolish events, events of sheer terror. We seem to be living in a world gone mad with fear, anger, hate, mistrust, and overwhelming ignorance. My heart breaks for the families affected by the recent tragedies in the news, my soul weeps for those wanting to help but not knowing which way to turn. In the coming days, weeks, months, and years ahead know this. I care about you. I want nothing more than for each and every one of you to find love, peace, and joy in your lives and the lives of those around you. I have not all the answers, in fact I have very few of the answers. I am as lost and confused as the rest of you as to why these things within such an advanced society continue to plague us.

I do know this, I will continue to love you. I will continue to try and be the change I wish to see in this world. I will continue to be a voice for the voiceless, and a hand outstretched with compassion and kindness where there seems to be none. I will not live my life in fear. I will judge you on the content of your character and not the colour of your skin, or the god(s) you pray to.

I am a military brat, an officers wife, a soldier's mother, a battle buddies friend. I am a thread within a rich and diverse tapestry encompassing and crossing borders, cultures, languages, religions, sexual orientations, beliefs, and time. I will continue to celebrate all that I am, while also learning and celebrating all that you are. Please join me in being a light in the dark and continuing to fight the hatred that threatens to tears at whom we truly are. Brothers, sisters, children, mothers, fathers, lovers, caregivers.. Humankind. Let us all, Be. Both.

To the father of my son and extended children, whom wrote the open letter above. I have known you long before you put on a uniform and have been blessed to be there to see the journey you've taken and the man you have become. I am always and forever proud of that man. You have always been willing to run in and help when others would run away or turn a blind eye. The actions of a few do not dictate the actions of the many. You are now and have always been a good man, with or without a uniform. The recent actions of some have little to do with the actual uniform, but the choices of some lost, scared and yes some bad people. Period. I am honoured to continue to have you as a part of my life and will forever stand next to you.

Thank you for always being someone not only I but our children and the public can call upon to be a heart of compassion, a voice of reason, and a light in the dark.

I am deeply sorry that this is even something you would ever have to address. I am sorry that you will be seen as someone to fear, or not trust. Nothing could be further from the truth.

I love you.

Effective Communication

From the mailbag:

Shannon K asks:
What qualities do you think are found in a "best friend"?

For me it's a little more than the atypical "nice person" adjectives. Sure I'm a fan of honesty, but I am also a fan of compassion and kindness and the three are not always mutually exclusive. Being a good listener, but also having a strong voice and personal ideals, someone who inspires me to do my best, someone emotionally honest with themselves as they are with me. Someone who's passionate, and has a sense of humor.

              Someone like me, only better,


Derrek A asks:
"If money were no object and you could do, go or be anything you wanted, .... what would you do first and why?"

If money were no object. Oh what a world that would be. I'm rather practical when it comes to questions like this, however the first thing I would do would be to call my ex Jim. He and I would work out the logistics in having all of our kids and chosen family in one place for a weekend of laughter and reconnecting. After that all of our children would be in school that was completely paid for.

My next call would be to Tieg and as it happens to follow with that line of call Arash, Bronwen, Jose, Zana, Jim, Alison, Gill and Renata. Tieg and I have a mutual love of animals, dogs in particular. It would be our dream to have a massive piece of land that housed not only a sanctuary, but a rehabilitation center, and agility training course. Money being no object would also dictate that I could afford to ensure we all had the best training course around with Tieg as lead. The space would rival that of a local sanctuary, with log cabin house for each Tieg and I, along with housing for those workers that wished to live on site.

Tieg would of course have to have a wood working shop, and Arash would have a cabin for his creative advertising business that we would of course be his first of many clients. I would want those I trust deeply and know love dogs so Bronwen, Jose, and Renata would all be asked to be team leads in some capacity. Alison, Zana, Mattea and I would most likely be the ones I turn to for boots on the ground and going out on calls. Gill I would have as a holistic practitioner aiding in holistic care, and as our office lead as she has an attention to detail that really makes all the difference.

Jim I would ask to sign on as part of an outreach program for at risk youth as this is something within his brilliant skillset and work that into our program. Ideally I would like to see Jim and Renata team up together. Renata is a genius with both kids and dogs yes, but she like Gill has a gift for natural living. If I could have her extend the outreach program to a community garden type thing...Where we could be self sustaining in our primary foods with the ability to cultivate any and all excess with an outreach program to give back to our community.

 I'm a firm believer that if we can enforce the general care children and young adults have for animals and their fellow man, combining that with education and a desire to help something or some else we can effect great change within our world.

Effective communication is a complicated concept. Like Gandhi once said, "If the assface fits, wear it....Assface." -EL

Word to your...Godmother

FairyGM: I wish I had been there for you. You went through a lot in a relatively short amount of time. I want to cry when I think of how badly he treated you.

Jade: Oh don't take that on, I am after all the architect of my own design. You had your own children and grandchildren to care for. Life isn't terrible, and all my failures have made me stronger.

FairyGM: You know you don't make it easy for people to take care of you. If you ever wish to remarry that will be a problem you'll have to correct.

Jade: Oh it can't be as bad as all that, men love a take charge woman who doesn't require them to save her. They find it helpful when their wives don't burden them with trivial things like feelings.

FairyGM: Gives me her best "you know this is why you're still single" look.

Jade: Fine, I'm open to the possibility of being...inaccurate. Alas I'm old and those interested in me are either far too young or looking for a mommy replacement. So I suppose, I'll just have lots of casual sex.

FairyGM: Chokes on her cup of tea and hits me in the forehead with a cookie.

He's grasped reality

"This isn't like the video games -- if you crash you don't get an extra life."
          -- Child, sitting in the passenger seat, commenting on parent's driving.

A Bomb

First love is unrequited ultimately because it’s so huge. It’s such an act of giving and it requires so much back that it can never be given back. It’s like an atom bomb…It’s all the energy of who you are and who you want to be and what you love and what you hope to be explodes. It is impossible for a single…human being to offer that back to you in a mutual way.
— Stephen Fry