Confused

It never fails to amaze me how many women feel that a woman’s only purpose is to procreate.  We are in an era of woman truly understanding and fighting for their rightful seat’s at the proverbial table, all while also embracing that we are not baby factories to be bred and be used like livestock.

We have grown accustomed to the moronic men whom believe that none-sense; but to hear the same rhetoric come out of other women’s mouths is truly sad.  How are we ever going to fully advance and beat back the patriarchy while other women are our own worst enemy?  We’ve seen the insanity at the voting booths, we’ve seen it online, and we’ve seen it within our own families.  What do the patriarchy loving women really gain from the men they cower too?  I’m honestly not seeing the benefit to their actions.

Mothers Day 2021

 Good early morning Mother's Day to one and all momma's out there.  Be you momma's to flesh babies or momma's to fur babies; I see you.  

Mother's day can bring with it both the bitter and the sweet for many.  To the mother's whom have yet to hold their babies, be they unborn or still a glint in their eyes; I see you.  To the mother's whom have lost their mother, by whatever means; I see you.  To the mother's whom struggle with mental illness, doubt, frustration, or chronic illness; I see you.  To the momma's taking care of their own or another's mother whom can no longer take care of themselves; I see you.

To the momma's who's babies ad to leave this earth too soon, and who are having to hold them in their hearts instead of their arms; I see you.  To the momma's who gave their children to another, ensuring they had a better life; I see you.  To the momma's who are co-parenting, step-parenting, or are adoptive parents; I see you.  To the momma's with partners, without partners, or with multiple partners; I see you.  To the momma's wo's babies are covered in fur and will never leave home; I see you.

Being a momma is so much more than just giving birth.  It's a state of mind, a depth of caring that comes from deep within one's own soul.  It is my fondest wish that you each know and understand that each of your stories are valid.  

May love and light envelope you all, today and every day. 

Holiday Cheer

Merry Christmas and Happy Yule to everyone who celebrates this holiday season, Hanukkah and Kwanzaa. Whatever you celebrate pertaining to your authority, be safe this season. To say everyone is going to have a wonderful holiday season is naive.  Be mindful and extend a supportive hand, show humility and compassion because adversity does not discriminate.

For more years than I can count, there have been many attempting to remind others that this is a season of loving and compassion.  It isn't about the gifts and greed that often accompanies all aspects of commercialism.  There's no time like the present to accept such knowledge into your heart.  I challenge all to preform one act of kindness.  One "pay it forward".  One honest to goodness, act of kindness.  If we each did just one of these things every day, maybe, just maybe our world would be a better place with far more hope than we currently have.

Holy Eyebrows

In my not so humble opinion, it’s important to let people, this includes our children to express their individuality through makeup and/or clothing choices without judgment or ridicule.  As I've always stated, 'if the worst thing my children do is come home with a hairstyle I don't like, how lucky a parent I will be."

So I need y’all to know I do not condone the fucked up, hyper-exaggerated penciled on sperm wiggling across her face eyebrows one of my dear friends is currently experimenting with. My silence should not be interpreted as approval, got it?  I mean, it’s a goddamn mess but it’s HER goddamn mess.

 DO NOT THINK I’M DOWN WITH THIS LEVEL OF FUCKERY.

Nodding and Smiling

He's out of control.  She hasn't an ounce of control.  It a recipe that just screams disaster.  So here we are.  Hosting a new path while still learning about each other.  No longer childless or alone in our growth or travels.  He's a child, just.  He's no life skills, or discernible means of being on his own.  Thats is ours to correct now.  Human or animal related why do I continue to be given things that other's wish to throw away?

I take on the challenge happily.  Or at least something close to that emotion.  But yes, I do have concerns.  I do have a fear or two.  May they remain just those things on my peripheral and may they never become a reality.  I've never agreed with our societal, "just get a new one" mentality.  I suppose it's time to put y money where my mouth is.   

I cannot help but wonder if I will always have to spend my life fixing what other's break.  It's a thankless job, but it does have it's rewards.  Let's hope the path to those rewards do not cost me, my sanity.

Tread Lightly

A touch as soft as velvet

A voice as sweet as wine

An everchanging presence

With a stimulating mind

A smile that rivals sunshine

Her laughter light upon the breeze

Her general aura is embracing

But she's apt to change with ease

I can be loud and brash, within the right circumstances and company.  More often than not however, I even while laughing and joking around am quietly listening and watching.  I observe, continually what others do over what they say; but I am always listening to what is said as well.  My circle is tight and kept that way with good reason.  There are those whom believe themselves "friends" when they are by my standards nothing more than acquaintances.  My life and feelings wouldn't change should they happen to disappear from this world tomorrow.

Life will always continue thusly.

Should someone think themselves worthy of my time and or attention, they had best bring their A game.  I suffer not those whom think themselves superior, rockstars clamoring for attention, or closed minded bigots with diarrhea of the jaw.  I've found of the years nd even recently that those with said afflictions never have a clear grasp of the woman I am, or the meaning behind my silent smile.

More's the pity for them.

One such, human as entered my life over the past three months.  She's proven herself lacking and as of yet hasn't discerned the intent behind the silent smile.  Yet she persisted and pushes the closer to the line in the sand made of crushed glass and foes of yore.  Not ever sensing the danger she eagerly throws herself towards.  Chosen ignorance, a clear lacking of decorum, social grace, and common sense are humorous to be certain.  But like all jokes, told too oven and with far too much bravado, they not only cease to be funny; they become tiresome to the point of utter rejection.

I've grown, I've matured, I've sought out better manners in which to deal with conflict.  Yet there in the shadows lurks the attitude and fortitude to back it all up, when the need arises.  For all concerned I truly hope she learns to tread lightly and understand the company she wishes to keep.  I am far from above putting her in her place, harshly.
  

Risk Vs. Reward

It’s something many weigh before doing something for another.

I don’t.

What I give, I give freely should someone choose to abuse that or speak poorly of me behind my back for it, that only speaks to their character not mine.

I will remain as I always have. Head held high.

💋

Sometimes it's memory loss

Sometimes it's just disinterest?  I've shared a fair amount already about my memory loss and the calamity that can occur thanks to it.  But sometime's, okay quite often it's just a sheer desire of not wanting to engage with others while I already have so many rumblings running through my mind. Of course there is always the question dancing through the back of my mind, "do I know this person?  Have I actual history with them, or are they just rambling on because I am so damn approachable?"

Yesterday I stopped into Starbucks for a long awaited treat.  My signature stimulant, designed by me for me way back in the days of green aprons and plastered on smiles topped with whipped cream.  While I waited for my cup of bliss to be completed, the woman behind me broke into a long winded rather detailed story about her latest experience in Longo's.  What that experience was, I am not entirely sure.  It had a few heights and a very significant low if her body language and tone were any indication, though I cannot be certain as I really wasn't that focused.  It all went something like that:

- 10 to 20 seconds in: Alright this isn't too bad.  She's got a hair that keep flopping every time she nods, oh I should nod too! 
-  15 seconds in: Hrmm she shoelaces aren't even.  Did she tie them herself?
- 18 second in: Oh that's my coffee!  Come to momma Venti dark and delicious.  Crap, she's still talking.  Inch away and nod again...why is se touching my arm?  She's impeding my caffeinated pleasures. 
- 30 seconds in: Crap nod again, smile and look convincing...oops less teeth.
- 35 seconds in: Attention waning rapidly.  Did she just say she just say she rode a donkey? WTF? How did this go from Longos to a donkey?  Does she mean Eeyore? 
- 40 seconds in:  Eeyore, hrm; Winnie the Pooh?  Oh I need to buy honey after. 
- 50 seconds in: How long have I been tapping my hand against my leg?  Where is she in her story? Huh...wtf she laughing?  Should I laugh too? Haha ok that wasn't stupid sounding at all!
- 60 seconds in: Alright I've played along, but I'm gonna loose it in a moment if she doesn't just shut up. 
- 65 seconds in: Okay lady this rides been fun but I want off now.  I have no clue what shes said and I cannot pretend any longer and if my caffeinated cup of bliss is cold now I'll have to rip off her eyebrows...

Being the non awkward people person I am, I reached past her, wrapped my clawed hand around my drink and said "See ya" without a backwards glance. 

Totally nailed it!     

Drinking Games

Much to many peoples surprise, I am in fact not a big fan of drinking games.  I never have been.  I prefer to note that as an adult I don't need a game to drink, just a glass and enough scratch to buy the bottle really.  Plus I must admit that being that out of control, and possibly vomiting on myself isn't my idea of fun. 

So now here I sit after hours of research and combing new sites, and reference sites.  Amidst collecting all of the required data for my paper, noting that I have read so many political blurbs, reports, and full on articles that a drinking game sounds like a smashing idea.  I say we make it skill level expert and you must be politically inclined to play.

Here are the rules:
Open your browser
Hit feeling lucky in Google
Every single post you see that is political, about Donald Trump, Justin's duckie socks, or has you wanting to become a pirate and make them all walk the plank... take a drink or a shot. 

Now if you are playing this game correctly, your home if not already on fire should be on fire within the hour.

Cheers

Jive On

'This is not f*****g fair that you took me off the train because I had my foot there because I was comfortable like that,' she said.
'There is no law that tells me that I cannot sit that way because I paid to be in there' but the officer replied: 'It's the rules of the train.'

Meanwhile as small group of bystanders gather, including a woman, later identified by LAPD as 22-year-old Selina Lechuga, who can be heard shouting expletives at the officer.
'Are you f*****g kidding me? You really have nothing to do,' Lechuga says.

Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-5306109/LAPD-cop-filmed-dragging-woman-train-feet-seat.html#ixzz55OS4aSypFollow us: @MailOnline on Twitter | DailyMail on Facebook

It's well known that I am not always the most tolerant person of sheer stupidity and blatant disregard for your fellow man.  It is also pretty well know that I gave up my vehicles many years back and have chosen to walk, bike, bus, or train my way around this globe.  On an almost daily basis, I ride the bus.  When the load is greater than is comfortable, or feasible for a bus ride I will call upon my trusted cab company to wisk myself home.  I may in fact be one of the few whom does love to drive, but also loves to ride the bus.  I do not hold the hatred many have for public transit.  It's a privilege that I truly appreciate.  Plus I do enjoy people watching.

You notice I used the term privilege, not a right.  Much like driving a car, riding public transit is a privilege not a right.  If you drive like an asshole you'll lose you license and if you are an obnoxious passenger you may indeed be asked to get off the damn bus.  So why are so many up in arms and slamming the LAPD officer for removing the "teen" she is 18; an adult, off the bus?  I see headlines and rants of "abuse of power".  So lets just look at the abuse going on.

The rules of public transit are pretty simple really.  Pay your fare, be respectful to everyone on the bus, music should only be heard by you not everyone on the bus, keep bags and luggage out of the way and off the seats, make room for others to sit, always give up priority seating to those in need, and in general don't be a asshole.  I am paraphrasing the rules I'll admit but yes that pretty much sums it up.  Now there have been many instances where people including myself have screwed up.  It was not intentional, but it was our error.  Errors that are really quick, simple fixes.  Apologize to the one(s) you offended, make quick amends (ie: change the behaviour immediately).

Bethany Nava, chose to ride the train, she chose to put her feet up on the seat because and we can quote her "because I was comfortable like that."  When asked as is well within the rights of the officer, for Bethany to get off the train, she was both disruptive and in being blunt a total uncouth asshole to the officer she was removed by all the while putting up a fight.  But this is somehow the officers fault?  Seriously?  You're going to tell me that if your child behaved with the same attitude you'd have not given your kid a smack on the ass and told them to clean up their act?  I can say that I would have.  Actually let me not lie to you, I would have seriously spanked either of my children for that level of bullshit.

I am amazed at those so willing to defend Bethany and her asinine behaviour.  Where is the accountability?  Yes she paid for her ticket, just as you'd have paid your car insurance.  Does that mean you can dive however you want?  A few years back I screwed up on the train.  I was just learning the routes and where the tracks were that I needed.  It was damn overwhelming I can admit.  So when I heard that the train I needed was about ready to depart, I ran and as I passed the presto machine I swiped my wallet across it and kept running.  I had to make the train!  No where in describing on how to use a presto car and machine does it say swipe your wallet.  It clearly says swipe you card.

So I make it up to the upper level on the train and am so relieved.  I can get home sooner rather than later.  I am in the quiet section (Yes there is one and you had better be quiet. Seriously) and I am resting quietly with my eyes closed when I feel the tap on my shoulder.  It is the transit lady with her handy machine to swipe cards to prove that we all paid.  No problem!  I tap my card, and am told I tapped it too fast.  So I tap it again and see her face change to annoyance.  Ok what had I done to annoy her?  Well for starters, I had NOT paid for my ride.  I explained what I had done and like any public servant who had more likely than heard this "bullshit" far too many times, she took a deep breathe.

She was feeling charitable and gave me a choice.  I could take the $150 fine and have my card taken, or I could have to .50 cent lecture right there in the now silent section in front of everyone who was now well aware I did not pay to ride like they had.  Noting that my back account had maybe 75 dollars in it and really not wanting the hefty fine as well as also loosing the 50 dollar balance on my card, I chose to receive the unforgettable lecture.  I took my very embarrassing lecture like a big girl and apologise profusely whilst the man next to me chuckled and nudged me and whispered "oh your a bad girl" making it all that much worse.  Now I openly admitted that I was an idiot and failed to do my part and the transit officer took both joy and pity in my plight, but was ultimately very kind.

Had I responded as Bethany Nava and Selina Lechuga had with profanity, and telling the transit officer, "don't you have anything better to fucking do?"  How do you really think that embarrassing scene would have ended?  With the .50 cent lecture?  I likely would have been arrested and had a much more embarrassing tale to tell about the time I not only failed to pay for my fare but also acted like a class A cunt.

But someone putting there feet up on the seat isn't as bad as even accidently not paying for their fare.

I beg to differ.  There are rules for riding any public transit and we are expected to obey them.  I cannot even begin to tell you how pissed off I get when I get on the bus and see someone with their feet on the seat.  So whatever your feet have walked through I now have to sit in?  That is for those that actually move their feet after I stare them down with an arched brow.  Those that don't move their feet get told off very bluntly and may still have their feet shoved off the damn seat.  What I really want to do is punch them in the face for being so damned ignorant.

The likelihood is that the Sgt is going to be reprimanded for doing his job, and the little bitch is going to get away with her bullshit to remain a selfish dipshit the rest of her life playing the victim while the rest of us try to do the right thing and not beat the ever loving shit out of her. 

Metro's 28 page customer code of conduct states that 'placing feet or shoes on seats or furnishings' is prohibited disorderly conduct, which may be penalized with a warning and/or ejection from the train.
Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-5306109/LAPD-cop-filmed-dragging-woman-train-feet-seat.html#ixzz55OlPJEhS Follow us: @MailOnline on Twitter | DailyMail on Facebook

Just Ask

This guy's walking down a street when he falls in a hole. The walls are so steep, he can't get out.

A doctor passes by, and the guy shouts up, "Hey you, can you help me out?"
The doctor writes a prescription, throws it down in the hole and moves on.

Then a priest comes along, and the guy shouts up "Father, I'm down in this hole,
can you help me out?"
The priest writes out a prayer, throws it down in the hole and moves on.

Then a friend walks by. "Hey Joe, it's me, can you help me out?"
And the friend jumps in the hole. Our guy says, "Are you stupid?
Now we're both down here."

The friend says, "Yeah, but I've been down here before, and I know the way out."


I've certainly been down here before, it can be a little tricky navigating the maze and a few of the sinkholes are real bitches but if I made it out, so can you.  Plus, you don't have to do it alone.  Not ever again.

If I call you my friend, I mean it.  If I call you family, I'm in for life.

He Lost His Head?

Denis Cuspert, also known by stage name Deso Dogg, was a German hip-hop artist before becoming affiliated with Islamic State of Iraq and Syria (ISIS). He made propaganda videos for the group, including a 2014 video where he showed off a severed head for the camera and encouraged other Western youth to join him. He was designated as a “global terrorist” by the US State Department in 2015.

Now the reports vary on Denis' death.  While someone who knew Denis personally from his rapping days says that a released photograph, does indeed hold many of the characteristics that they associated with Denis, at this time that is really the only "proof" we have.  Further, it is very uncommon for extremeists to actually show photographs of their fallen.

Denis Cuspert, 41, was a high-profile hip-hop artist known as Deso Dogg before turning to jihadism

CREDIT: DI MATTI/DPA

While we may be all hoping that this insane man is indeed dead, his death has be reported before falsely, which is common among terrorists to throw off investigators. He was reportedly killed by an airstrike in Deir Ezzor, a province in eastern Syria where Isil still has small pockets of control.


There was no independent confirmation of Cuspert’s death from the US-led coalition and Western security services have long warned that foreign fighters might try to fake their deaths to throw investigators off their trail.

 If Cuspert is truly dead, his killing marks the end of one of Isil’s most colourful and charismatic Western jihadists.

Peaceful Easy Feeling

The possibility of stepping out of ones well constructed comfort zone is a terrifying process.  At least it is for a good 80 percent of the populace.  Knowing that stepping out of a well constructed comfort zone has both the potential to be amazing, life changing, and life shattering is something that gives 98 percent of the populace pause.  How could it not?  Pain for the most part is an unwelcomed internal and external force.  Outside of the masochists, who wants to hurt?

I implore you to take that leap of faith just the same.  It may not end in the hearts and flowers kind of bliss you secretly hoped for, but you may find that you have landed in the presence of another soul you can, even if only for a brief time, connect with.  Where the laughter is plenty, the conversation easy, and for that moment, even if it is just that moment; your heart is lighter and a little more fearless.  Your smile is genuine and reaches your eyes. 

As the song goes, "its a peaceful, easy feeling."

I don't know about you, but I could do with a lot more days and nights feeling like that. 

There is help a text away

Let the word spread, let the people know, there is always somewhere they can turn.

Did you know that if you text 741741 when you are feeling depressed or suicidal, a crisis worker will text you back immediately and continue to text with you?  Many people, especially younger folks, do not like talking on the phone and would be more comfortable texting. 

It's a free service to ANYONE

In The Next 4 to 8 weeks...

According to the SPCA and Humane Society, in the next 4-8 weeks, you'll all be seeing the "We need to re-home our pet..." posts. These are the people who went ahead and purchased puppies & kittens as Christmas gifts who are suddenly allergic, moving, having a baby, don't have time, their kids won't take care of it, didn't think they'd get so big, blah, blah, blah. Problem is, almost 90% of unwanted pets, sadly end up in kill shelters.

Allow me to break it down for you.

You didn't know you had an allergy? Oops. Don't let the pet suffer, buy some allergy medicine, if you love your pet, it's absolutely worth a shot.

You're moving? What city are you moving to that doesn't allow dogs? Bullshitville? You have a responsibility to your living, breathing family member to plan ahead to find a house, apartment or condo that will ALLOW your family member. Period.

Oh, you had no idea you were due to have a baby in 2 months? Interesting. Get a dog trainer if you're housing a breed you fear might become an issue. It's also worth a shot.

Don't have time for ONE 15 minute walk, or to have a dog just sit next to you while you're home? Really? So they're better off in a shelter than waiting in your house for you to get home? Ok, perhaps get another pet to keep them company or look for a local dog-sitter.

Oh, you mean your 5 year old didn't step up to the plate to feed, walk and scoop poop? And this surprised you? I guess it's time for YOU to step up and model responsibility for your child.

Wrong size? Not cute as an adult? Not quite the personality you expected? Look in a mirror, how did you turn out? Should we send you back? 😡 

Swipe Left?

It's time to get your head out of the clouds and your legs in the air!  This consequently is the motto of 90% of the men on dating sites.

Single by choice

"How would you like to live under my skirt?"  

Things we think but never say or act upon is as vast as the space above us.

Catch and Release

He wasn't coyote ugly by any means, but he wasn't what he appeared to be at midnight.  Now in the glaring light of day, his lopsided smile was ok but not drool worthy.  His overall appearance was 'cute' in a grown masculine way.  By all standards he was a catch.  It was his hands.  Those things that should be able to grip tools as well as hair, now in the stark light of day were tool small for his body.  Looking like doll hands on overdeveloped arms.  They were the hands of a young boy, not that of a man and it made my stomach do a flip-flop that had nothing to do with butterflies and everything to do with loosing my liquid lunch.

Yes, I can be shallow and picky.  Often times after the point of no return.  My bad.  Still, this is just not something I can overlook.  It will matter not how kind he is, how smart, or funny, or how good in bed he could be.  Those hands are just not ever going to do it for me.

What can I say, sometimes I want to make sweet passionate love; other times I want a man who'll pull my hair, smack my ass and say, "You're mine!"

Tiny hands need not apply. 

Oh you're..still... single?

What’s a Queen without her King? 

 Well, historically speaking, more powerful.

Depending upon who's asking this can sound as though the asker is surprised, or if related to me, and in a position as my blessed very Jewish, very princessy God mother much like eternal disappointment/shame/and condemnation.  Tauntie is this tall lithe figure, who just so happens to always be well put together.  Hair, did, nails did, you know how the song goes. 

Next to Tauntie, I look like a schlub.  A homeless schlub, possible with alcoholism.  Should you ever feel as though your self esteem has reached new heights, come see my Tauntie and we'll have that issue cleared right up.  For those of you whom have been reading , well a long while you may remember that Tauntie is also my Godmother.  I like to call her my Fairy Godmother, to her face and she in turn slaps my ass in this loving yet reprimanding manner which is somehow supposed to remind me of my place and that while she adores me I will forever remain a disappointment.

Oh the subtle nuances of having a Jewish princess for a Fairy Godmother.

So this morning, Tauntie decided to surprise me with a very early visit.  Like she knew I'd be home...alone.  Now the fact that she was right isn't important!  I mean I'm a grow woman, she should have called to see if I was up, or had company, or was busy.  Alas no, Tauntie and her knock, a knock that is at once alarming and yet filled with disappointment alerted me to the fact that I was only wearing a wifebeater that had a glaring wine stain on it and no pants, with day old makeup and smeared lipstick.  Life as a grown single woman is ever so glamorous.

Now there will be those of you whom woke up refreshed, greeting the day, and possibly family members with a smile and song in your heart.  I however opened the door to those pursed lips and the once over glare.  "What have you been up to?  Are you entertaining?  Darling you look like an old stripper!  That's no way to keep a man!  ..where are your pants!"   These were the rapid fire statements that hit me like a bucket of cold water before I could even say good morning.  So as I found pants, a bra, and something resembled a clean shirt Tauntie, being Tauntie pointed out all of the things that I needed to clean while lifting my freshly filled wine glass and eyeing me over the rim of it with a look that spoke volumes.

Whatever happened to sleepy Saturday mornings filled with cartoons and staying in your pj's till 3 in the afternoon? 

Tauntie in her effort to aid my 'barren love life' began to impart her particular brand of wisdom upon me.  "Darling, now listen to Tauntie...  Men, all men love three things.  Food, sex, and a woman who can be quiet."  My arched eyebrow and subsequent smirk were derailed when she added, "we both know you have a gift with the first two, but that last one needs work darling."  How any one person can sound so proud and filled with total shame at the same time is beyond me.  I of course not having a grasp over that last one; cannot be blamed for my smartassed response. 

I ever so delicately informed my always correct Tauntie that in this case she may in fact be wrong.  Her indelicate snort told me just what she thought of that, yet I pressed on having already had wine and still reeling from my chocolate cake hangover.  I agreed that no I was not always the shy quiet type but I had my moments, and that yes I can cook and bake up a storm with the added gift of drizzling it all in a shiny tempered chocolate but that my sexual prowess may be ever so lacking in my...maturing years. 

You see I cannot be so blase and say "been there seen all that" when it comes to traveling the world over; but I have traveled a far amount.  Now in my travels, I have come to take note of one very common face and sound; that being of the tongue out/gagging/almost vomiting noise with wrinkled nose and eyes watering being a sign of clear distress and dislike of something. 

As I explained this Tauntie knowing me as well as she does crossed her arms over her chest and and waited with a perfectly arched eyebrow and a cautious, "continue darling.".   

"...well having come to that well informed bit of information Tauntie, I must confess that I feel as though I am unlikely to please most men.  For those troglodytes all seem to think that face while accompanied with those sounds mens put your hand on the back of my head and push my face down harder which has me thinking they are all seriously fucked and I'm having none of it!"

For a brief moment I was certain I could visibly see her xanax stop working.  So I did the next best thing, I lied like a rug....

So T, were having a June wedding; Tauntie isn't liking the idea of haggas a a main dish or of you wearing a kilt.  In turn I say go for it and sorry for dragging you into my fresh hell, but appreciate you going the distance with me on this.  Hope your Saturday is fantastic, text you soon.  xo 

“Sorry, I’m not Adele. I don’t wish the best for you, nor do I want to find someone like you. I do, however, want to set fire to all of your stuff.”   

Not an ounce of makeup sex either

If I’m a sarcastic asshole when I talk to you, it’s either because I really like you and feel comfortable teasing you, or I really hate you and don’t care if you know it. Good luck figuring out which one.

Today I got my fifth,"I'm sorry" message.  I don't know what the hell is going on.  Suddenly the punk that was once a part of my life has decided to temporarily grow a conscience.  Now this isn't the first time he's attempted to do something like this.  It's as empty as his head and heart if truth be told.  Long ago and in a far away land I was as big a fool as my shapely ass.  Today however I am far bolder, wiser, and self assured.  The Punk, he's a manchild with anger issues and an abusive streak a mile wide.  When called out on his abusive nature the Punk likes to play the victim, when confronted face to face he likes to threaten with physical violence and horrifically vulgar language.  It's a tedious as it is pathetic.  He would see this post as an insult, while I firmly stand by the fact that I am simply describing him in accurate detail.     

I just think it'd be nice if there were no need for these surprise "I've been such a shit, and I miss you" messages.  If maybe we all valued each other a bit more, and you know if he would accept that he needs to get actual help in taking responsibility for his abusive nature.  I am however not the person to help him with that particular issue.  I couldn't care less if he died screaming.  Yes, people screw up.  People do the wrong things.  However not taking responsibility for your bad behaviour and seeking to actually change said behaviour, then turn around six months to a year later with,"Hope [you] will forgive [me] and don't hate [me] I miss you".  Of course his version of the aforementioned apology also includes, "Do you miss me and my huge ....?  I'm sorry for the things I said but you made me..."

It makes me want to write back and say, "Forgive you?, nope.  I do forgive myself for being such a twit and ever having given you the time of day.  Lesson learned, you are still a goof and I'm not going another round."  Then I remember the promise I made to myself of never, not ever going down that road again and simply blocked his damn number. 

When in doubt of how to respond, remember the rule: "Don't feed the monkeys.  They'll only throw shit at you for it."