How are y'all? Whatcha been up to?
Busy as a bee on this end. The desire to loaf a little; watch sappy movies nonstop; while sipping piping hot homemade Chai tea with frothy milk and dark honey; while listening to Yani; is occupying my frontal lobes. I did save my foster pup from certain death. You know, the end of summer stuff.
Turns out just when i think im in the clear, life rears its maw and lets out a big thunderous laugh.
I am thrilled beyond belief that pup is doing great. I'd have bawled my eyes out if the little nugget hadnot made a full recovery. Still I am now viewing the negative balance that was once my account and crying big fat salty hot tears on the inside. As such, I am also wondering why I never became a stripper or a whore. Men like a phat a$$ right? Oh I could have been a well paid puppy saving legend with full dental and health benefits. Oh the path not taken it such a disheartening thing.
I am now accepting bids on the following: Beyond Jennifer and Jason, a blessed find for those wishing to name their children something less fucking mundane, circa 1980; a video of drunk me doing something slightly risqué; a half-full (the power of positive thinking!) bottle of colloidal silver; and the body massager my best guy pal said looks like a cross between a massive vibrater and anal beads. Which I bought after my car accident to wish away the pain in my lower back. It has this cool infra-red heated end that totally works for cramps too. It's a little slice of cramp free heaven let me tell you!
Actually, scratch the last one. The thrill of being electrocuted by a giant vibrating infra-red dildo anal bead massager is too good to give up.
I'm open to ideas, though, and I can always con my drunk as hell friends into humiliating situations and take possibly illegal photos of them with garden tools and stuffed toys of your choice. Message me with your flights of fancy. I'm sure we'll all enjoy the chuckle. Or at least I will.
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