Pro-boner

I don't know what I'm doing at a strip club. Oh, wait, yes I do. What everyone does at a strip club, pay way too much for watered down drinks. I've never been to this one before. It has two stages, one for male dancers and one for female dancers. I suppose we're all waiting for something. Ass for some tits for others. I happen to be waiting for the guy on stage 2 to finish up so we can go eat.

I don't often discuss with many people that I'm bisexual. I've never hidden it, but far too often the over-sexed crowd hears "bisexual", and I'm having to explain that I've no interest in being their third. I rather like just falling for someone based on who they are, not just the package they arrived in. I'm quite fond of the idea of one day waking up with a breast in each hand. Neither of which belonging to me, but this isn't the place for that. So here I stand, alone; waiting for my bro-zone friend finish shakin' his groove thang and not really finding anything appealing this evening. So I keep going to the bathroom to take a break from the way to loud music and the lawyer who's way more drunk than he should be. At least in a public place.

There is a line every time. The second trip I am arguing with a Golden girl who's so far past her prime that her pussy drops dust each time moves forward. I keep letting people in front of me so she can't talk to me but she continues to turn and speak to me as though were fast friends. Its like this horrible reality show, with drunken slags and booty shaking queens. Finally, the line thins and I find myself hovering over the loo playing the balancing game and thanking the tranny in the next stall for the wad of toilet paper s/he slipped me under the stall. S/he tells me something very reminiscent of When Harry Met Sally, only he's way more Sally and way less Harry.

My third trip was thankfully cut short by my booty shaking bro-zone pal. He emerged just in time to save me from lawyer dude who was offering to show me his legal briefs pro-boner, then giggling like a wasted prom queen. Yeah, cause that would never get old.

Pro-boner.  Really???