Sextacy

Love, lust, desire, intimacy, awkwardness. Hookups and infatuation. One night stands, or friends with benefits.  Because it's personal. Even when it's not.

Studies (link) have shown that 80% of men have a positive overview of their one night stands, while only 58% of women feel the same. I think in general we can all admit that men do one night stands better than women. Within the study it also showed that while seeking out a one night stand, women up their standards while men dropped theirs incredibly. Go figure, most some men will fuck just about anything when horny. Such is the way of life and lust.

I would have to agree with Anne (a researcher in the study) in her statement:

"Often [women] said things like, 'I felt so flattered, so happy that he found me attractive. It was so nice to be wanted,'" said researcher Anne Campbell, a psychologist at Durham University in England. "What women don't seem to see is that men drop their standards massively for a one-night stand."

She added, "No woman should be flattered because a man wants to have sex with her once."

I happen to be one of very conflicting beliefs. I see nothing wrong at all with one night stands so long as each person gong into is realistic and honest. Come on what better time to be honest? It's not like you'll ever see one another again anyways, so what are you afraid of? While  am no stranger to a one night stand, I happen to find them boring. I am a woman whom craves passion. Wild abandon is a plus and yes so too is comfort. FWB tends to be the better option for those kinds of things, though they have a greater risk of fantastically horrific disaster.

Fantasy is just that. As such has nothing to do with the end game, romance, that white picket fence or the 2.2 kids with dog and cat that get along. So while some may manage having a friend with benefits for some time without any recourse. In the end having a fuck friend boils down to you merely being fucked, and friendless. Still we all continue to trod upon that path believing the next one will be different, we will be different. We'll view things with a more cynical eye, after all it's just sex right? We're fools the lot of us. Crazy, hormonal, sex driven fools, in the pursuit of happiness. One lay at a time.  


On the whole I have to shake my head and laugh at most women who claim to just want a one night stand. I've seen far to many of those women latter sobbing into their wine over how "he never called back". Even some of the more stalwart women get that far away look in their eyes as they speak of that ONS. It's laughable really.  No matter the day or age, women typically equate sex with love or a desire for a deeper connection. Of course it can be when you're with someone who feels the same, but that someone isn't going to be the guy who's looking to get rid of a wicked case of blue-balls.

Listen up ladies, sex is, just sex. If you want a deeper connection, a honey to call your own... well you're going to have to take more time in getting to know him than just how quickly he can make you climax. There are those that would claim I lack the ability to love. Nothing could be further from the truth. I love deeply and without reservation. I just don't happen to confuse climaxing with life long companionship.

Just a thought. Now go have one of your own.