I'm A Dirty Girl

4:26 PM
That client is, gone. She's also one of the whiniest people on the face of the planet. It has you wanting to rip out her voicebox after only 3 minutes of listening to her speak. Okay that wasn't very nice of me. She probably has these honkin' adenoids that if removed would make her head collapse, so the whiney voice isn't really her fault. See, I can be a complete sweetheart, when I'm not being such a dirty girl that is. So I was thinking about sex. All kinds of it really. Vanilla, chocolate, mocha almond fudge with extra nuts....hrmm, probably hungrier than I thought, still it works. So yeah, I was thinking about sex and then this fire truck went by, and I contemplated the tackiness of waving them on in like some radio tower landing a 747. It was then that it hit me. I completely forget to unload the dishwasher.

Damn.


3:42 PM
Really I shouldn't have to post anything after that title. I should just let you wonder if I'm some sex kitten or simply a woman whom never bathes. Mystery is good for a relationship I hear. You know, them? Yeah they said so. No I don't know 'them' but I'm told there swell! Oh I came to find, that sitting pretty; well your arse falls asleep when you do it properly. Kind of blows, and not in the good $20 dollar hooker kind of way. Speaking of, are $20.00 hookers good? I'm curious is all. Not looking for a career change or anything, cause even sex day in and day out...well yeah it's sounds good, but it's sounding more like "work" and less like a 'fucking great time'. Yep, I’ve got one odd little visual going on now. No; I don’t want to talk about it. Pervs.

Alright, I’m both. Wait that isn’t true either, I bathe. Daily, point in fact. I shave too, use soap and water and other groovy things too. It all started in the shower really. Me and Mr. Loofah were talking quietly and going over a few things. It was great, until I realized he wasn’t buying me dinner, or porn. Life goes on I’m told. Then I managed to get more back yard work done, take two cats to the vet (and no one’s pooped, peed, bitten, vomited, or scratched me! Yeah me.) and make it home with time to spare for more hot and sweaty, gardening. I wore gloves today. Yeah, I had a manicure done yesterday. *G* Kitten has a lovely set of painted claws. (Linkin Park After Dark, is the colour.)

Okay, I’ll bbiab, a client has come in and ‘demands’ my attention. Oh now she’s so going to get it.